Monday, November 03, 2008

Success...

I've come to the realization, with the help of a couple of friends, that I have a messed up definition of success. I never would have thought this about myself. I’ve never been someone who was concerned with climbing up the corporate ladder, so I thought I had it all under control. My priorities were elsewhere, and that was enough. Well in this season of life, where everywhere I turned there was a wedding, an engagement, or someone telling me they were having a baby I started to get a little down. I felt like everyone was moving ahead, taking the next step in life, and I was just hanging out in the background. Stagnant. Not going anywhere.

My view of success may not exactly be the worldly one. I may not chase after money or the next big thing, but I have set marriage and having a family in the forefront of my list of goals for my life without even meaning to. I’m not saying I think it’s wrong to want these things, I just think that they have SO consumed my definition of success, that I feel like what I am doing now is not as good or not as pleasing to the Lord, which is completely untrue.

I was challenged to spend some time in the Word and really figure out what God’ definition of success is. This is hard for me. I see people who followed hard after God, who were called His friend, who served him despite incredibly difficult circumstances. I don’t see a lot of myself and my mindset in these people. I need a shift in thinking. I want to say with the utmost sincerity that I want to live for Christ above all else. I want to serve where He has me, no matter what the condition.

When I sit and think about the things God has done in my life, and the ways He is allowing me to be used in the lives of my students, in the lives of friends. When I look at the way He has changed my heart so drastically in the last couple of years. When I think about my life in this light, with a fresh perspective, I can’t help but see success. As long as I am following Him and seeking after His will for my life above all else, my life will be successful. And that’s what matters. I know it is a daily struggle to keep my perspective where it should be, but it’s worth it.

3 comments:

Laura said...

so good. so so good.

Lisa said...

oh, my friend, I am SO challenged by that! you should do some sort of something with that information. i miss you. let's walk really soon. way to press on and continually search for higher and deeper truth than what the world says. love you!

natalie said...

I understand your struggle COMPLETELY my friend and am walking through it myself. Glad to know I'm not alone on this journey. :-) Love you.