Wednesday, July 29, 2009

July is almost over?!

Wow - it's been a long time since I posted on my blog. It has been a whirlwind month or so. From finding out I failed my test, to finding out our landlord is going to sell our house and having it put on the market, to one of our busiest months of the year at work, to the trips home to say
goodbye to Mama and then for the funeral. I feel like I haven't breathed normal or really been my normal self for a whole month. But I'm working on it. I'm working on getting discipline and a schedule back in my life with working out and studying again.

I'm looking at Boden on a daily basis during my lunch break and wanting to order cute fall
clothes, but restraining because it's months from being fall here, and because that whole discipline thing goes into my budget as well. But a girl can dream of wonderully colorful scarves & sweaters & skirts.

I guess that's really about all I've been up to. Really, just trying to get back into the routine of life. I've started a post about my Mama, but haven't been able to finish it yet. But I will, she was very special to me, and she deserves her place just might take a little time.

Thursday, July 09, 2009


I'm sitting here. In a hospice. My Mama is dying. It came on sudden. It is sad, but she has been fighting the physical effects of a stroke since 1996, and I am happy that she is headed to a place where she'll be able to feel her whole body, not just her left side. Where she won't have to ride a scooter. And where she gets to be with the One who changed her life and made her the woman that she was.

Sitting with my family today, and reflecting on her life has made me so thankful for the legacy that she is leaving for me. I have a grandmother who loves Jesus with all her heart. I was thumbing through her bible today, and happened upon this verse underlined, with my name and 1983 written next to it: "But from everlasting to everlasting the LORD's love is with those who fear him, and his righteousness with their children's children." She has sought the Lord with her life, she has served people, and she has taught me how to fight, and she will be missed so much.

I just got here today. I have been working this week, because of course, like everything else in life (think crazy surgery in the middle of tax filing season), it happens when work is crazy and the timing makes for insanity. I feel like I spent most of this week torn between two worlds. The world where I could be useful, and do my job, and the world where I really wanted to be, with my family. I am thankful that I get to be here now. With my family. It has fun to sit with my family and tell stories about her life and just remember who she has been in our lives. It has been emotional, but good.

I'm not sure why I'm sitting here writing this, but I haven't blogged in a while. It's what's going on in my life. So, there you have it.